68 people like the idea of a black panther in Ayrshire?
Reporting Scotland continue to headline and to milk the one mad cow from Huntly. A reporter was sent to Boghead Farm to report that and I quote: ‘Bugger all has happened here all day! There will be no results for at least a month. OK, the farmer and his wife are ‘devastated’. That do for your story? It’s boring here. You said I’d get a real story to cover.’
Right, here’s a real biggy: ‘A temporary police officer has sent an email saying he doesn’t want just two female armed officers because the ‘testosterone balance ‘would be wrong.
‘ The email has two errors and, like Prof Robertson does with our errors, we’ve put (sic) after them. We doorstep the Justice Minister and get him to agree it’s bad. He smiles patiently, as you do with bairns, and says the Chief of Police will sort it out. Have BBC England ever done that with the Home Secretary? They’re too scared?’
Next: ‘Offences against disabled people are the most under-reported hate crimes in Scotland. It’s estimated that 93% of such incidents are not reported. Wait, are we not going to mention that other hate crimes based on religion and race are falling in Scotland yet soaring in England? It’s not newsworthy? Wait do we not need to source that claim of 93%? Won’t that Prof Robertson complain about us again like he did on the autism school suspensions thing?’
Finally: ‘A police warning to the folk of South or is East, Ayrshire telling them not to approach a black panther sighted in the fields near Drongan and Coalfield. They can be quite dangerous, the folk in those villages. Do we need to tell them not to approach a black panther? Mind you it must be getting on a bit that panther. It was first seen in 1969 during the peak of LSD consumption in the UK.’
OK Professor Smartypants, what’s wrong with these stories. What would you have reported on instead?
The Brexit threat to Edinburgh’s world-leading cancer research?
UK Government set to challenge Scottish court ruling that could prevent Brexit?
Mundell breaks ranks to air concerns over transition extension?
Margaret Fleming murder trial collapses?
Scottish ministers pile pressure on firms dodging modern slavery duties?
NHS England sent 154 eating disorder patients to Scotland?